Stupid And Insane Defenders Against Chaos: A Lovecraftian Horror Comedy by Onezumi Hartstein

Stupid And Insane Defenders Against Chaos: A Lovecraftian Horror Comedy by Onezumi Hartstein » My Annoying Life Comic http://www.onezumi.com/wp-content/themes/fluid-index-10/img/fancyfacelogo.gif Onezumi.com http://www.onezumi.com http://www.onezumi.com Where Irresistible Evil Meets Immovable Stupidity Fri, 03 Feb 2012 13:03:14 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 Giant Disappointments http://www.onezumi.com/2012/02/02/giant-disappointments/ http://www.onezumi.com/2012/02/02/giant-disappointments/#comments Fri, 03 Feb 2012 00:57:53 +0000 harknell http://www.onezumi.com/?p=2731 Comic

Sometimes even the greatest of beings can run into disappointing circumstances. Take the case of Cthulhu. I'm sure that after sleeping a near eternity, and being beyond even death, one would still like to get a nice breakfast after ascending to the surface to drive mankind insane. But no, the waffle apparently was a lie. What won't be disappointing though is our appearance at Katsucon in 2 weeks. We'll be on a few panels (outlined by Oni on her blog in this post) and have a table for both our work here and also for our event Intervention. As usual we encourage you guys to stop by our table or panels and chat.]]> http://www.onezumi.com/2012/02/02/giant-disappointments/feed/ 0 Where is Boo Berry Cereal? http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/23/where-is-boo-berry-cereal/ http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/23/where-is-boo-berry-cereal/#comments Tue, 24 Jan 2012 02:12:30 +0000 Onezumi http://www.onezumi.com/?p=2720 Comic

Guys, I'm going to have to make this one short because I am so exhausted right now. We had the worst rain and fog on the way back from work so it turned my hour commute home into nearly 2 hours. There were times I couldn't see more than 8 feet in front of me. I think I sprained my asshole on the drive back because my eyes are about to fall out. I still have to do a lot of work for Intervention tonight, so I have to pull myself together. I coudl just fall asleep right on my keyboard here. Such is the glamorous life. So, it's tough to find Boo Berry cereal these days, I had an idea of where he might be. I have to add that Harknell meeting me at the door with cappuccinos, doing laundry, cleaning up, and making dinner when I'm too busy running myself crazy with this insane work schedule is awesome. I'm so tired right now I can't even talk with the work-making about it much but you get the idea:

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]]> http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/23/where-is-boo-berry-cereal/feed/ 0 cappuccinno Washing The Internet Clean With SOPA (Yeah, That’ll Work) http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/17/washing-the-internet-clean-with-sopa-yeah-thatll-work/ http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/17/washing-the-internet-clean-with-sopa-yeah-thatll-work/#comments Tue, 17 Jan 2012 14:57:07 +0000 harknell http://www.onezumi.com/?p=2714 Comic

To rehash an old adage, there are 2 types of people in this world: those who can read this entry on our website, and those who don't know a goddamn thing about the internet. Guess which category is in charge of making laws about how the internet works? If you haven't heard about it there has been a strong effort (backed by many legacy content creation companies) to figure out a way to "leash" the internet. The idea is that the internet allows people to "share too much" and induces massive copyright infringement, which as we all know is absolutely equivalent to stealing 100 million cars everyday. Since these companies are required to hire little gremlins to sit on the internet and hand copy every bit of data being sent out, it obviously costs them a huge amount due to this "theft". So they ~~have written the legislation~~, I mean, ~~have paid off~~, I mean, requested that their ~~paid lapdogs~~ friendly national politicians protect them from this horrific loss of income. To do this it's simply a matter of destroying the entire internet...simple right? To do so they have attempted to put through a few different laws, most notably the "Stop Online Piracy Act" (SOPA) and "Prevent Internet Piracy Act" (PIPA), both of which have no real chance in hell of actually stopping anything. One of the few bright points of having complete dullards passing tech laws is they often pass things that won't even hit the intended target. In these cases the methods that were being pushed to stop piracy wouldn't in fact do much at all, except break online security (HA!) Luckily it looks like opposition to these laws has finally come from those who actually use the internet, and those who make their money with the internet (by the way, isn't it funny that companies like Google and Facebook make way more money and support the economy way more than the legacy companies that are requesting we destroy the internet?) So, to help out these old tech impaired Luddites we decided to create a new marketing campaign (today's comic) for them to get their point across in a way that makes sense to them, and will really show off their deep understanding of the problems of a free internet.]]> Comic

I kind of hate getting my picture taken. It seems that I always blink at the wrong time or so something weird. Photos are really kind of difficult, especially if you have a distorted perception of your body - which I do. Even though I am an artist, I have trouble matching my own skin tone, and my perception of myself can change wildly from one minute to the other. I don't feel that I have ever been very photogenic, but I have to deal with it because I work in the media and photos are everywhere thanks to social networking. I wish I could tell you something powerful and motivating about getting over a distorted perception of self, but I can't. Harknell has been great at supporting me through being like I am. One day I might feel like a superhero and the next I might feel that I appear to be a billion lbs heavier than I really am and refuse to eat until he freaks out on me. I've proudly (for the most part) beaten anorexia and bulimia, but I still have the remnants of this shit left. Sometimes I wonder if it ever really does get better. I wonder if anyone who has had this every really recovers? ]]> Comic

I just did a post about how annoying it is to deal with chronic pain in winter. It's one of the reasons that I hate it. We had a great weekend at MAGFest, but I was working the whole time. There is a misconception that when I am at a convention that it's a party. The reality is more like heavy labor, long hours, and diarrhea. Work is work, even if it's at a fun place. I was glad that I got to play some old arcade games. The gaming industry lost me somewhere about 10 years ago. It probably had to do with how boring and frustratingly without peripheral vision I find first person shooters. I'm a Street Fighter/Mortal Kombat/Streets of Rage/Golden Axe/Soul Calibur, or survival horror type of person. MAGFest really reminded me that I am not NOT a geek. I'd been worried that I don't care for most of the popular stuff out there recently. I admit it, I am an asshole. I automatically suspect things that are trendy. On the bright side, it means that I have vetted everything I like carefully. On the bad side, it probably means I am a dumbass. I'm going to try and not hate so much on what I perceive to be trendy BS. I still take issue with the "find a model and put glasses on her" approach to geek girl marketing, but I'll try to adopt things that I normally wouldn't. Maybe I'll learn something. ]]> Comic

Onezumi, as we all know, sees the world in a different way. She also like to name things in *special ways*. So what would she call the phenomenon of "big" guys buying Smart cars? Today's comic starts a new series of Onezumi terms.]]> http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/06/big-man-little-car/feed/ 1 Post college friends http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/05/post-college-friends/ http://www.onezumi.com/2012/01/05/post-college-friends/#comments Thu, 05 Jan 2012 20:53:38 +0000 harknell http://www.onezumi.com/?p=2696 Comic

When I was in grade school, options for friends were limited to the disgusting howler monkeys I went to school with. At the time you think this is serious shit, but the truth is almost no one still has friends from that long ago. In High School, again it seems like its important and friendships will last a lifetime. The shock comes at graduation when everyone scatters like a bunch of cockroaches. I still have friends from this time period, but that is largely due to the Internet. If we didn't have the Internet, I may have retained only 1 from this time period. Same deal with college, but by this time you are prepared to lose friends upon graduation. The new thing in this period of your life are the flakiness that freedom from parents allows people. Every month I lost a friend due to them becoming a drunk, smoking too much weed, embarking on a vaginal tour of the campus, or all of the above. College wasn't fun for me, and I didn't make many friends that lasted more than a month. So here I am post college. Most people only get friends from their jobs. This can be tough when you work in an office that isn't much fun, which happens a lot to most people. I made a ton of friends from my work in comics, blogging, and my Digital Media convention though. The problem is that they live all over the world. It's damn hard to find people to do things with where I actually live. Coupled with the fact that I am super career-driven and busy--forces me to be picky about what activities I find worth my time (I don't do average movies or frivolous games because I'm always cooped up in my office...last thing I want to do is also sit around in my free time.) ...it's not fun. ]]> Comic

There's been a disturbing trend recently in how the US government has been leaning in it's legislation. If I was a bit more paranoid I'd think it's a matter of trying to lock down it's citizens and their ability to communicate. That's where things like SOPA (Stop Online Piracy Act) come in. This law would make it easier for the government and other entities (mostly big companies) to shut down internet sites that "promote piracy". As it's defined "promoting piracy" could be as simple as allowing people to post comments that mention places to download or watch copyrighted content--note I said mention, not actually host the content. The internet is a scary place to established legacy publishers (the movie business, music business, book publishers, etc.) because by it's very nature it allows people to easily manipulate, trade, and interact with media in a way that can't be (by design) controlled or contained by gatekeepers. The history of the last 10 years or so has been these legacy publishers lobbying for laws to get a grip on the internet to keep their monopoly on access to mass culture. They were caught by surprise by Napster, Google, and Facebook, and if they could they'd kill them all with fire. Our ability to publish this comic, as well as our thoughts, is based on keeping the internet free and accessible by anyone. Part of the reason we created the event Intervention was to promote and highlight the power of online distribution for the individual. SOPA, and laws like it, are an attack on us, you, and anyone who has dreams of doing anything online that isn't owned by a corporation. So, I ask that everyone join us and help keep kicking these old school idiots in the nuts and keep running as fast as you can, at rabbit speed, into the online future.]]> Comic

It seems that a lot of digital media companies think that they can get more money out of their customers by making things less convenient through form factor and/or price. This is stupid. I have news for Netflix - it is never attractive to me (or anyone who understands the internet) to wait for them to mail me a DVD. I have that plan and I just don't use it. I think Harknell uses it every once in awhile or I would have canceled it a long time ago. The internet has given us choices. Instant gratification is now normal. I pay for streaming, so I want to stream my rentals. The End. I'm OK with paying money for things. I do that all the time. The thing is that I don't want to pay money to get something in a less convenient format for me that will probably never be used. Oh gee, If I buy this plan, you send me a laserdisc* that is delivered to me via the back of an elephant. I don't think so. I want to buy and watch what I want to buy and watch now. eBooks have a slightly different problem right now. They are very convenient, but priced moronically. Most eBooks cost more than or the same price as a hardcover book and have DRM that prevent you from sharing it or viewing it on every device that you use. You basically end up with the more or most expensive version of the book that has less usability than a physical print book. One might say, "Hey, buy a print book." Nope. The catch is that my life and many other peoples' lives don't work with print books anymore. We all have devices that allow us to read books. I personally have no desire to carry a huge book around with me during my ridiculously busy day anymore. In fact, before I found out that I could display books on my phone, I hadn't even read one book since college ended. It wasn't because I didn't want to - it was because I was just so busy. When most of us have devices with us at all times that can read books, it just doesn't make sense to carry another thing with us. After I got my phone, I was very excited about buying a ton of eBooks. When I realized that it was more expensive and less convenient, my enthusiasm cooled. I found it insane that the concept inspired me to spend a lot of money on eBooks..but the pricing structure is priced for the companies and not for the consumers. It's more attractive to me to buy a new softcover or used softcover, shove it on my bookshelf, and illegally download the digital version that is free of DRM. Until the publishers realize that modern consumers don't want items that are priced for the publishers' benefit, this market will not catch on as much as it could catch on. *NOTE: I actually have a laserdisc player, but that is beside the point.]]> Comic

Some of you are getting ready for a long holiday break. I am not, since I am still a contract employee. This means I don't get any paid out of office time. Its been that way since i got downsized in 2006. If anyone wants to offer me paid out of office time, please contact me on LinkedIn. I'll be working all next week and I don't know if I'll have a contract past February. :/ However, the good news is that I'll also be working on comics next week. This means that the other comic on this site, "Stupid and Insane Defenders Against Chaos" will finally be updating regularly again starting in 2012. Thank you all for reading these-please share them with your friends. I'm working on the books for both comics, and some supporting artwork for Stupid and Insane. :) As you can tell from today's comic, C is definitely for something other than Cookie in my case.... - Oni!]]> Comic