onezumi.com : Stupid and Insane Defenders Against Chaos

As an artist, even if you don't identify as a professional, you are still susceptible to Sharks. Sharks have many forms, but they have one thing in common: they are liars who want to take advantage of your skills without paying you or helping you in any way.

Sharks are usually great speakers. If you hired this Shark as a motivational speaker at your High School, you would probably have something bigger than the Roman Empire built inside your school gym within the week. Sharks are very smart people. They know the weak spots that new artists have and where to strike.

The frequency that I alone have had to fend off a Shark is quite troubling to me because I know that they will eventually find somebody naive enough to take advantage of. Consider this article your first line of defense against these glorified puffer-fish.

A Shark's Promise

Some Sharks hold contests. The object of these contests is not to help you, but to get many starving, new artists to spend their valuable time on custom-made work for them so that they can pick one "winner". This "winner" is really a big loser. You get the honor of your work being used by Some Guy. This Some Guy probably does not have any money, because if he did, he'd commission work the proper way rather than holding a bullshit contest.

Sharks know that many new artists are hungry for acceptance. These contests are a way to give them that and waste their time. Allow me to say this as gently as I can: The promise of exposure is fucking bullshit. Unless they are paying you and treating you with respect, they are not worth your time.

You should never ever do free work for somebody or surrender your copyright on anything without a severance fee. (This is not cheap.) If somebody asks you to do this for them, don't walk - run in the opposite direction.

The Screwing of a Lifetime

Recently I was given the "offer of a lifetime" by some random people. They wanted me to do the art for their convention packets. I would be designing con pamphlets, a whole program book, postcards, flyers, create their mascot, and do their web graphics. They wanted me to surrender the copyright to their mascot and all the art involved, because they wanted to use it year after year without my consent. I'd be doing all of this for "exposure". I'd be featured at the con, but of course I'd have to pay for my own cross-country flight and hotel and everything else. But I had to act fast; otherwise somebody's girlfriend was going to nab that prime spot.

If you don't see anything wrong with this, you are a very mentally challenged human being. We are talking hundreds of hours of work for no pay. The going rate for this kind of hard work starts at $50 per hour. Is this a coveted spot? No. I think not. If you are still thinking that the exposure would be worth it, let me fill you in on some information.

This convention never happened.

They claimed it would be the west coast's biggest new con. It was supposed to kick off last summer. Funny enough I have never heard of it, and a quick Google search comes up with zero. If people are going to treat you this unprofessionally, you can certainly expect that the entire way.

Even if it did happen, the great lengths they went to make sure that I had no rights to my own work speak volumes. What is stopping them from not promoting my work at all? Absolutely nothing. They easily could have taken my stuff and told me to get lost.

I've also dealt with people who try to entice me by telling me how famous their company is, regardless of the fact that I've never heard of them. Another technique is to appeal to your desire to help out the unfortunate. You know what unfortunate is? Starving to death at your art desk. Do you think they will help out an unfortunate artist by paying you or donating their work to your charity? If the answer is "no", then step off, son.

Cinderella Doesn't Exist

The art field is not a Cinderella story. You will not win a contest or be approached by some new company and suddenly be swept away by the promise of exposure. Regardless of your technical skill, you will become successful by making smart business decisions and tolerating the first hundred or so rejections you receive. Normally these companies are unknown for a reason. They do not exist. If all you find is a website that says what they do and there are no examples of it, you can be sure that they want you to do everything for them to get them off the ground.

Everyone has a dream. I could put up a website in a few hours full of empty promises and big talk. Not everyone knows how to make it happen, and some people would rather dupe others into doing it for them. Usually these kinds of arrangements don't fully work for them, because they become caught in their own lies, but it hurts you in the process. I have lost track of the sweet-talkers I have had to deal with that have a dream but just want to get people to make their dream for them. Later on it comes out that (surprise) they want me to work for them for free. Let's just say that this new company does work out. This rarely happens, but it is not unheard of. Do you honestly think that once they are making money they will give a shit about you?

Unless it is in writing, the answer is no. You are a potential stepping stone for them. My advice is to extend a critical yet polite ear to people who ask you for your services. If it is too good to be true it probably is, but there is no reason not to be polite while you are getting ready to research their credibility or mentally laugh at them as they walk away from your table.

I really don't like people who waste time. Especially mine.

One final word of advice

The fastest way to find out if they are a Shark or not is to give them your business card. Tell them to contact you with the details of the job and that you will put them in contact with your lawyer. If they have nothing to hide they won't mind. If they head for the hills or never contact you again, then you just repelled a Shark. Congratulations. The best part is that you don't even have to have a lawyer for this technique to work.

Be safe. Protect yourself, and the rest will fall into place.

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Beware the Sharks: Protecting Yourself from Scammers